Friday, February 13, 2015

Valentine's Day poems

It's Valentine's Day! To celebrate, here are some "love poems" that I've written over the years. I'll start out with a serious one before quickly devolving into the absurd.

Reasons to Say "I Love You"

It may seem like a silly thing to do;
restate the obvious
day after day
but it’s the one thing that makes sense in my life
I want to keep it at the top of my mind
I want you to know it

It’s like people go to church
week after week
when they already know what they believe.
They’ve got to keep it at the top of their minds.
So I say I love you
and I keep you at the top of my mind.

I catch the sparkle from your soft green eyes
and I find the reason why I’m still alive
why I stroke your hair when you’re asleep at night
why I kiss your cheek when you leave the house
and I say I love you
and you think I’m being goofy but I’m not,
because I worry worry worry when you’re out of my sight
and you’re always at the top of my mind.

I’m remembering the moment when I first saw you
you looked back at me
from the doctor’s arms
and I said I love you
and I never looked back.

A Donkey Kong Love Song

I’ve tried to be like Mario
a brave unlikely hero,
but despite the cheerful music
always ringing in my head,
every finish line brought disappointment.
Another path,
no destination.

I’ve tried to be like Mr. Toadstool
to be scholarly and helpful
but books make cold companions,
and my dialog was often skipped.

I’ve tried to be like Yoshi
gourmand, and loyal steed,
but friends, like plumbers, can be crushing loads
and I got darn sick of koopa soup.

So I’ll take my cue from Donkey Kong,
who’s wise as he is strong.
I’ll find a gentle princess
and hold her close and tight.
We’ll climb the heights of love together,
and barrage with heavy objects
anyone who tries to part us.
Credit: "Donkey Kong Gameplay" by Source (WP:NFCC#4). Licensed under Fair use via Wikipedia -

After a Mediocre Dinner Date* (with a tune inspired by the folk song "Red River Valley", that I am ignorant to transcribe)

Please please please, please don’t leave me
I really am a strong and smart yet sentimental man,
but if my virtues will not woo you
then listen close I’ve got a backup plan.
I’ll tell you a little secret,
then I know that you’ll understand

There are little red haired men and they harass me
they come to me whenever I’m alone
when you close the door they’re here beside me
they grab at me and I scream and groan

Those b******s, I just don’t know what they’re after
perhaps it’s that they want to see me dead
howling hissing scowling scheming, even
louder than the voices in my head

So please stay with me just this evening
don’t leave me to be torn apart by elves
I know your friends say I’m crazy
I assure you I’m quite sane
and if you lie beside me just this evening
we can keep it like a secret to ourselves

*I originally wrote this poem to be humorous, like a guy just saying whatever nonsense he can think of to get a girl to spend the night. Much later I realized that there is also a darker way to interpret it. The elves might be symbols for alcohol, drugs, or some other self-destructive behavior. Alternatively they could be depression, or some other mental illness. I think that interpretation would make this poem a lot more meaningful, but it's not what I was thinking of when I wrote it.

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